Thursday, October 15, 2009

Scar Tissue

My aunt recently had major surgery to correct a prior surgery. I guess the previous surgeon did a not so clean job, or my aunt healed strangely, but she developed internal scar tissue that continued to grow inside her and obstruct certain organs from functioning properly.

I feel like that's what's happened to me. Like the previous inhabitant of my heart made a not so clean break. A bad tenant that left me broken to heal on my own. And now the scar tissue has encased my heart, keeping it from functioning as it should. Not allowing me to feel. Closing off the door to anyone else that might want to find housing. Abandoned. The walls grow thicker and not a soul is able to see the contents inside...not even my own soul. I have no knowledge of what my heart feels anymore, let alone what it means to truly experience any emotion.

I long for God to mend this, for his healing hands to embrace my heart and cut back the layers of hurt and pain.

1 comment:

  1. I like this entry. Not that I like that you're feeling apathetic, but I like it. Know what I mean?